When I was left for dead
by Mystical Light
Summary: Castiel Winters was driving his cousin across the country on a road trip. He should've never stopped at that dinner in the middle of nowhere. TW for suicidal ideation and light slash


Disclaimer: I do not own Supernatural. Nothing monetary is being made for my having written this.

I'm not entirely sure of where this story came from exactly. It was just something that popped into my head one day and kept expanding until I ended up with 5000 + words. I just really wanted to write a Castiel and Samandriel road trip story. There's no angels here -just people. Unfortunately sometimes people are just in the wrong place at the wrong time. I have to warn you guys though, there is a little suicidal idealation so if that's something you worry about then maybe this story isn't right for you. There's also a little slash bit too. Otherwise, I suppose you can say this takes place in Season 4 and Castiel is about 31 years old while Samandriel is 18. And here we go. Enjoy.

* * *

"You're driving like an old woman."

"I am _not_," the driver said, sounding curiously petulant.

The teenager sitting in the shotgun seat groaned quietly to himself in derision as he readjusted his back against the mostly hard (and uncomfortable) bucket seat. His ass had fallen asleep ten miles ago, he was hungry, and the air conditioner was freezing his arms since they were directly in line of the jets of cool air blowing on them. "Yeah, that's why I just saw a turtle crawling by your Accord."

"Look Andy," the driver said, turning from the road to glare pointedly at his passenger, "I promised your parents I'd take you across the country - I didn't say I'd do so in a quick manner and you knew that going into this little "adventure"."

Air quotes? Who in their right mind had taught him how to do air quotes?

The cousins locked eyes as the elder male motioned with his head to the maps Andy was holding and said calmly for the third time in the last two hours, "Now, what does the printout say is the nearest attraction?"

Andy rolled his eyes before shuffling through the fifty or so papers on his lap. "Hershey, Pennsylvania is twenty miles from here, Cas."

Castiel Winters (Cas for short) motioned with his free hand and nodded his head. "See - candy. Guys in their teens love candy. I remember I did. You are still in your teens..."

"All right Cas, I get it - a town full of candy," Andy said, slouching in his seat and crossing his arms, "Woo-hoo."

Castiel watched the road and then watched his cousin. "I do not understand - I thought you wanted to go away for school?" he asked.

"I did - I do... I just..."

Their conversation was interrupted by the loud gurgling sound of Castiel's bottomless stomach.

"Are you feeling as hungry as I am?" Castiel asked with a sigh.

"Yeah," Andy said, cracking his back and also sighing, "we shouldn't have skipped that dollar ninety-nine breakfast thirty miles ago."

"Agreed."

Both of them fell into an agitated silence, watching the road and waiting for anything to pop up from a restaurant to a convenience store. Where's a strategically placed McDonalds when you need one?

"Ah-ha."

Finally Castiel spotted a relatively stable looking roadside diner with only one car parked in its otherwise barren parking lot. He pulled in right next to the other vehicle and turned off the engine.

"This place?" Andy asked with a frown towards the standing, decrepit structure.

"Why not?" Castiel asked as he exited the car.

"_Why not_?" Andy asked back, also leaving the car and slamming the door shut behind him. "Maybe because it looks like a light wind would knock out the power? Maybe because the windows are so dirty you cannot see anyone within? Maybe because -"

"Do you want to continue driving, searching for somewhere with food on these empty roads?"

"...No."

"Then we are going inside," Castiel said, walking to the door and going in.

Andy waited before following, looking over the road and the parking lot with its single car, a black Impala from the 60s.

"Samandriel!"

Rolling his eyes, Andy followed his cousin, muttering about how much he disliked the use of his full first name. Typical high school boy. The wait staff of two was standing at the counter gossiping to each other, neither of them noticing anyone had walked inside until Castiel coughed to get their attention.

"You can sit anywhere boys. Be wit'chu in a minute," one of the women said before returning to her conversation.

Andy picked a table at random and sat down. Castiel took a minute and looked at the only other occupied table in the place where two men were seated and having some sort of silent conversation with each other that they obviously didn't want anyone to hear.

"Cas," Andy asked, "are you going to sit down this century?"

The two men looked up finally realizing that they weren't the only customers eating at _Darrel's Diner_ anymore. Everyone stared at each other for a minute before returning to their conversation partners.

Castiel pointed out the door and said, "I will be just a minute, Andy. I just want to double check the maps to make sure we are still on the correct path."

"Whatever," his cousin said as he watched his best friend and mentor walk back out the door to the sound of a jiggling bell.

* * *

Samandriel "Andy" Milton was the youngest of all of his cousins and the last to graduate from high school, having done so this past June. Every night until he was ten years old, he used to dream about traveling the world, seeing everything there was to offer and perhaps learning the secrets of the universe and giving his knowledge to the world at large. That was eight years ago and times had changed. This wasn't going to be something easy but – being a doctor would help him on his way to that goal.

It was six months ago that Castiel mentioned making a trip together before Andy finally went away to college.

"When will be the next opportunity for you to see what this great country has to offer," he'd said over a cup of cocoa at his parents' kitchen table.

Of course Castiel would understand. They had the same dream of helping the world at large, Andy as a doctor and Castiel was well on his way to getting his PhD in psychology. Cas' side of the family was stricter than Andy's though so he'd never had an opportunity to see anything other than the small town he'd been raised in and gone to school in until he escaped for higher learning.

It was strange seeing his then quiet much older cousin change into a new man every time he'd visit during the holidays. It was to Andy that Cas had first admitted that there was a guy he met at school that he'd liked. Andy had told him to go for it and he did until they went their separate ways a few months later (amicably of course). He loved all of his cousins equally but Cas and he were closer to brothers than the sort of family you only saw a few special times during the year. He would do anything for his cousin and he knew Castiel would easily likewise.

"Hey, kid."

Andy looked up and the guy from the other table (the slightly stocky one) was standing right in front of his table, pointing towards him.

"Can I borrow your ketchup for a hot minute?"

"What?" Andy asked, slowly pulling his head from the clouds.

"Your, uh, your ketchup? Can I borrow it for my fries?"

"Oh," Andy said, feeling uncomfortable heat traveling up his neck and into his cheeks. He grabbed the bottle and handed it off to the guy and he walked away while laughing. The waitress finally sauntered over to the table a minute later just as Cas returned indoors. He took his seat and drummed his hands against the table in rhythm four times for no reason.

"You boys ready?"

"Yeah," Cas said, grinning widely, showing off far too many teeth, "two coffees and I'll have a cheeseburger."

Cas and the woman then turned their eyes towards Andy and, after blushing bright red but not saying a thing (still mentally reliving the ketchup mistake), his cousin ordered him a club sandwich with extra mayo.

"Thanks, Cas," Andy said once the woman went away to place the order.

"Anything for my favorite little guy."

Huh?

Castiel relaxed in his seat, putting his feet up on the booth's bench and lifting his left arm against the back, whistling to himself.

"So - we are still going in the right direction, right?" Andy asked while fiddling with his wrapped silverware set.

"Of course," his cousin said with that unusual grin, "I'll get us where we need to go."

He laughed to himself and shook his head, turning to look at the strangers at the other table. Not having anything else to do, Andy shrugged off his cousin's unusual behavior and began to play around with the salt and pepper shakers, alternating them so they were going in a circle before him. The pepper suddenly got away from him but, without looking away from the guys, Cas grabbed it from the base to stop it before it hit the floor.

"Thanks, Cas," Andy said for the second time in however many minutes.

Castiel didn't say anything but pushed the container across the table before turning, this time to stare out the window. Andy put the containers back in place but not before noticing a strange yellow dust on the pepper glass that wasn't there before his cousin touched it. In the quiet that engulfed their table and not having anything else to do, Andy tried to listen to what the guys at the other table were talking about. He had to strain to hear anything but he managed to catch a few words.

"_Followed…Drove forty damn miles…Demons….Hell…."_

"Here you go boys."

Andy turned and smiled as the waitress put a sandwich in front of him and a burger before his cousin and two cups of hot coffee for each of them with a small cup of creamers.

"Thank you, _Delores_," Castiel said, drawing out her name as he read it on her tag in a strange and sort of unsettling way.

"You're welcome," the woman said slowly, turning to walk away.

Andy carefully picked up his sandwich to put it into his mouth when –

"_Oh, Delores?_"

Andy looked and chewed as the woman slowly turned around. Castiel raised his left hand and twisted his wrist in a circular motion and the woman collapsed to the floor while her neck made a sickening cracking noise. When she hit the ground, she wasn't moving at all. Andy spat out his food and looked fearfully at his cousin's face.

"Cas…" Andy whispered over the sounds of cocking guns.

"Christo," one of the guys said.

Castiel flinched and blinked. When he reopened his eyes, they were pools of shadowy black instead of his usually unusual bright blue. He stood up from the booth and made a motion with both of his hands this time. The two guys were thrown across the room by an invisible force, leaving their guns clattering to the ground below them.

"Well, well - the _Winchester_ boys," Castiel said, reaching down for one of the guns and holding it as if he'd done so before in his life. "Fancy running into the two of you in the middle of bumfuck nowhere like this."

The taller one began to say words under his breath but Castiel 'tsk, tsk'-ed and the guy looked like he couldn't get in any air as he began to gasp.

"Hey Freak," the other guy said, "Leave my brother alone!"

In response, Castiel fired a bullet at the wall beside said guy's head. "I didn't say anything about you being allowed to talk, Dean!"

He strode forwards until they were staring at each other, eye for eye. The guy frowned in anger and uncertainty while Castiel gave him another once over and smirked.

"Of course I know who you are – doesn't everyone from your old neck of the woods? And, between the two of us, this little idiot I'm riding noticed you the second he walked inside. Thinks you're kinda hot though I myself just can't really see it."

He leaned in closer and stared thoughtfully at this Dean's lips. He thought something over to himself and shrugged while muttering, "I should give him a little something to remember you by. I owe him that, using his meat and all."

Castiel's hand reached out to the wall to steady himself as he put his lips to the other guy's. At that moment, the other waitress and the kitchen's cook came running out of the kitchen finally daring to see what was happening on the main floor.

"He's got a gun!" the waitress said seconds before Castiel walked calm as you please over to them and shot them both in the head, one after the other.

"Cas," Andy tried again, this time getting to his feet. Castiel turned the gun on him this time but didn't fire it.

"Don't think I won't do it, rugrat."

In keeping Castiel distracted, it freed up the formerly choking Winchester to continue whatever chant he'd been attempting earlier. His brother assisted him and Castiel took a shaky step backwards. In slow motion, he fell to his knees and dropped the gun as a huge cloud of black smoke erupted from out of his mouth before he finally collapsed to the ground in a faint.

* * *

_He'd gotten as far as Andy's door when he'd heard someone in heels walking up behind him. Castiel turned and there was a girl that wasn't there a minute ago with short-ish dark hair, pale skin, a plain shirt, a jacket, low rise jeans and a sinister grin on her face. She gave him a look over and nodded. _

_"You'll do," she'd said seconds before strange black smoke poured out of her mouth and rammed straight towards him, falling into him. _

_He fell back against his car and felt himself strangely compressing as something huge and otherworldly overwhelmed him completely. His eyes opened and he was seeing the girl's body lying unconscious on the ground before him._

_"Showtime," he said but did not mean to. _

_What had just happened? _

_"I'm taking you out for a little test drive, human," a nasally voice inside of his head responded. It sounded almost feminine. _

_He stood, adjusted his jacket and turned to look at his face in his side view mirror – but he wasn't controlling any of this. How was his body doing this? _

_"It's not your body right now, Clarence," the voice said. _

_Who - who are you then? _

_"Name's Meg and I've got a little unfinished business to take care of inside." _

_His face relaxed back into a neutral expression and he walked to the door and back inside of the rundown, highway diner to have a little fun with the patrons inside._

"Cas, come on man please wake up!"

Dean Winchester was not having a good day. At all. It was high time Sam and he finally caught some kind of break - a small vacation. They stop at one diner on the road and of course all hell just has to break loose. He looked to where his brother still lay and thankfully his chest was going up and down so, all in all, he was fine. Just another 'Strangle Sam Thursday'. That other guy though...

"Cas?"

Cas? What's that short for - Casper?

The guy moaned as he turned over onto his back. He opened one eye and then the other quickly followed.

"Is it gone?" the guy whispered numbly.

"Is what gone? Cas?" the boy asked.

"The smoke. Is she gone?"

Sam slowly got to his feet and while rubbing his neck he asked, "Who?"

"Meg," the guy (Cas) said while gulping for air, looking everywhere for the smoke to come back and swallow him up again. "She said her name was Meg."

Simultaneously both brothers groaned in annoyance.

"Friggin' Meg," Dean muttered. He walked to the bodies of the two women and the cook and sighed. Damn it…

"Dean! Dean, I think he's going into shock!"

Abruptly Dean turned and the guy was staring at something off in the distance and his mouth was alternating between moving but no words were coming out and hyperventilating. Shit!

"Castiel…" the kid whispered again, now near tears as he shook the guy by the shoulders.

Time to get the situation under control. "All right, Sam get them out to the car and get to the motel. I'll take care of the bodies."

Sam picked the guy up like he weighed nothing and wrapped his arm around the guy's shoulder to keep him upright.

"Hey, kid," Dean said and the young teen looked up to him, "You got his car keys?"

The kid looked like he'd forgotten what the words _car_ and _keys_ meant but he figured it out and reached into the guy's jacket pocket, grabbing them and threw them to him.

"All right Sam, just go and I'll take care of this."

"'kay, Dean," he said and was out the door, the kid trailing behind like a little puppy.

Why of all times did Meg have to pick right now? Dean walked over to the cook and turned the guy over onto his back.

"Looks like you folks were just in the wrong place at the totally wrong time. And with the wrong two people inside."

The door to the diner jingled and Dean turned. It was that kid again.

"What're you still doing here?" Dean asked, standing up.

"I - I don't really know. I got to your car and then I just said I'll wait here for you to finish and get a ride later."

"And Sam bought that?"

There's no way Sam would've bought that. And as if an answer from high on above was necessary for Dean to believe the kid, his phone buzzed. He looked at the short message, _Kid wants to ride back with you,_ and sighed.

"Wait outside."

"Why?" the kid asked. "What're you going to do in here?"

"Just need to grab some supplies and then we can be on our way ten minutes tops," Dean said as he walked into the kitchen, not bothering to see if the kid had even listened to him.

After doing a quick walk around, Dean decided that what he needed was probably downstairs in storage. He walked down a flight of stairs and took another look around.

"Bingo," he said, locating two, large ten pound bags of salt.

In short time Dean lugged the two sacks up the stairs and into the main room – where the kid was leaning over the dead bodies examining them.

"Hey," Dean said, getting the boy's attention, "I thought I said to wait outside."

"I-I know," the kid stuttered, "I just…I wanted to see…"

"What, you wanted to poke around a dead body?"

"No. It's just that…"

"Just what?"

The kid lowered his head and whispered through tight lips, "My cousin did that."

Dean put the bags down before walking to the bodies and doing his best to make them appear more…comfortable. There – their arms were now crossed over their chests and their eyes were closed like they were only sleeping. Except for the bullet wounds to the heads and the neck being at a strange angle.

"What's your name?" Dean asked in order to fill the awkward silence while he worked.

"Samandriel, but people just call me Andy for short."

"That's kind of a mouthful, Andy. And your cousin, the one Meg was riding?"

"Castiel – who's Meg?"

"A demon bitch from straight outta hell," Dean said, standing up and returning to the salt bags and tearing them open with his knife. "One that my brother and I have had the misfortune to run into time and again."

Andy looked down at the bodies again. "What're you going to do with them?"

"It's a little something that my brother and I have to do after certain cases which go far south. It's called a salt and burn. You see, salt purifies the body so that the spirit can be at rest."

"So, you put salt on the bodies," Andy said putting it together, "then –"

Dean took a lighter out of his pocket and gave it a shake to emphasize part two. He patted Andy on the shoulder and walked over to the window, lighting the curtains on fire. He then did the same for some menus and once that was finished simply threw the junk lighter on the bodies setting them alight.

"Alright kid, let's get going before we get trapped in here – or cops show up wanting lunch."

Andy ran out the door and Dean followed him out to Castiel's waiting Honda Accord.

"Do you know where your brother went?" Andy asked once they were safely inside, while he was buckling his seatbelt.

"Yeah, our motel room in town. Hold on tight and we'll get there in under fifteen."

Dean pulled the car out of the lot and Andy turned back to see the fire in the window of the restaurant and hoped it would not lead back to any of them as it slowly burned to the ground.

* * *

Sam was waiting by the door when they arrived.

"How's it going?" Dean asked.

"He hasn't moved an inch yet," Sam said, crossing his arms. "He closed his eyes though. He's sleeping right now. I think."

Andy went right passed him and sat by his cousin's side. Dean filled Sam in on all the details he'd gained and Sam nodded and the brothers came into the room as well.

"Cas, come on. Wake up."

"Dude's out like a light, Andy and you should really let him rest. Why were you guys driving around in the middle of nowhere anyway?" Dean asked.

"Castiel volunteered to drive me across the country to where I will attend college in a few weeks. He wanted to make a whole road trip out of it so we were seeing the sights of certain towns along the way."

"Just the two of you?" Sam asked this time.

"He's the only one that gets me," Andy said, rubbing his thumb over the top of Cas's right hand. "We're closer than just cousins. He's like my brother."

Sam and Dean shared a look, and then promptly began arguing with their eyes. It was quick fight which Dean won.

"Andy," Dean finally said, "I doubt your cuz is going to be up anytime soon so you're free to crash here with us until you're ready to move on out."

Andy looked down at his cousin again and then back up at the brothers. "Thank you," he said in a whisper.

"And, if I can make a suggestion," Dean said, "I think you should get a little sleep yourself kid – you look like you might need it."

Wordlessly, the kid nodded his head and moved to lie beside his cousin who still looked to be for all intents and purposes lost to the world in unconsciousness. As his eyes shut and his breathing slowly evened out, the Winchester brothers finally allowed themselves the chance to breathe and think.

* * *

It was hours later, well past dark, when Sam woke to the sound of someone moving around in the bathroom. More like stumbling really. He turned over and felt someone's warm, alcohol-laced breath in his face. It took him a second too long to remember he was sharing the bed with his brother tonight because their two guests were together in the other bed that the room held.

Sam lay flat on his back and waited for sleep to come back to him when he could hear the sounds of muttering now.

"_Our Father, who art in heaven…"_

Prayer? Okay…

"_thy kingdom come, thy will be done…"_ the voice was cracking ever so slightly.

Sam sat up and looked to the bathroom door to see that the light was on, leaking out through the crack at the bottom. He got up and walked towards it, noticing that only Andy was still sleeping right now and Castiel was nowhere to be found.

"_I'm sorry. I'm so, so sorry, Father on high."_

Sam threw open the door and was momentarily blinded by the bright light before him. He blinked and looked down to see red streaks staining the sink and wall. Along the floor. Sam turned towards the bathtub and, kneeling beside it with a razor in one hand and his other arm sliced and bleeding profusely, was Castiel.

"No," Sam said louder than he'd intended as he grabbed for the razor and took it from the man's weak hand.

"Give that back to me right now!" Castiel sobbed and reached for it but Sam, with the height advantage, held it far away from his reach.

Sam then heard rustling sheets and turned to the room to see Andy had turned in his sleep but Dean had awakened at the yelling and was coming towards him.

"What's going on?" he asked a second before noticing his brother holding a sharp object that had a drop of blood dribbling off of it.

Turning to look at the bloody Castiel and putting two and two together, Dean shut the door behind the three of them so that the three grown men were practically squished inside of the room but away from the ears of the younger boy still dreaming the night away.

"Please," Castiel whispered through his tears, "Please, you have to let me finish it."

"No way in hell man."

"I _killed_ those people. I killed them with my own two hands," Castiel said, looking down at his blood soaked left hand, like his own blood wouldn't be worth it.

"That wasn't you though," Sam said, taking a seat on the filmy, dirty floor. Dean also sat, with his back against the door as a means to block any sort of escape.

"It was my body," Castiel murmured. "I felt that gun in my hand. Broke Delores' neck. And I kissed…"

"Dean. My name is Dean and this is my brother Sam," Dean said, trying his very best to keep things light. "We didn't really get the chance to introduce ourselves before. And you're Castiel, Andy's cousin."

Castiel nodded and Sam came towards him, holding two towels (one dry and one he'd soaked for a second in the sink) which he placed against the wounds the man had made voluntarily.

"You've got a brave kid in there, you know. I only spoke to him a little while and, you know, he really looks up to you. He wouldn't want you to do this and abandon him on the road when you promised to drive him all the way to school."

Castiel didn't have an answer for that and neither brother really expected one either.

"Meg rode my body once," Sam suddenly said and all heads turned to him. Dean motioned for him to continue and after a moment's hesitation, he did. "Yeah, it was a while ago now and one day I just woke up in some weird motel room, covered in blood. I knew it wasn't mine (the blood) 'cause I wasn't hurt or anything but it was still too unnerving. She made me kill a guy, hold an old friend of ours captive and even make me hurt Dean. It was…horrible, especially when she made me think that I had done all of it."

"You didn't know?"

"None whatsoever - until I saw myself on tape. It was…it was brutal."

"And how might I be able to prevent this from ever happening again?" Castiel asked.

"Here," Dean said, reluctantly lowering the collar of his shirt, revealing the pointed star tattooed over his heart. "This is an anti-possession sigil. Sam and I got these after that little episode with Meg and we've been pretty good so far, I mean – nothing's tried to jump our bones or anything."

"And I should…place this symbol someplace upon my skin?"

"Only if you want to," Sam said, "otherwise, we've got some charms that could work as long as you keep them on you at all times."

"I believe something more permanent should be the righteous path to take," Castiel said before reaching in his back pocket and coming up empty.

"Something wrong?" Sam asked.

"My phone – please, remind me in the morning to take a picture of your tattoo to show to the artist of another town."

"Um, yeah," Dean said, sharing an uneasy look, "sure. Okay."

"You may however give Andy a charm. I would enjoy being in the room while you convince him to wear it."

"You sure he isn't going to beg for a tattoo like his cousin?" Dean asked.

"You going to be okay, man?" Sam asked Castiel hesitantly.

Castiel took a breath in and then slowly let it back out again in an attempt to calm his shattered nerves.

"It will take much time and more reflection for me to get over this event," he finally said, "but I believe that I will be able to move past this day and live my life to its fullest from here on out."

"Hey Sam," Dean said, "Get the stuff so we can patch up Cas' wounds, okay."

Without saying anything, Sam stood up and walked out of the room, probably trying to find the first aid kit in the dark so as not to wake up Andy who was still out like a light.

"Hey Cas," Dean said while turning only to have a pair of lips suddenly land against his own. A part of Dean wanted to pull away and check if the guy had suddenly become possessed again but he remembered Meg's strange words to him – _"This little idiot here noticed you the second he walked inside. Thinks you're kinda hot though I myself just can't see it"_ and just let it happen. When Castiel pulled himself away, Dean felt a sigh well up in him. _Damn._

"Was it good for you?" Dean asked.

There was a second of silence before a chuckle erupted from the other man.

"It was…passable."

Dean sputtered. "Passable? Passable! Buddy –"

"Dean," Sam said from the doorway, "what's going on in here?"

"Just testing a hypothesis, Sam," Castiel said, raising his scarred arm. "The results were (Castiel locked eyes with Dean) a solid eight."

Dean pumped his fist so fast, he managed to do the action before his brother could even notice it.

"So, good?" Sam asked, disinfecting the wounds.

"Very good," and Dean didn't miss the lingering look the man gave his body. Being the manly man that he was, he could confidently appreciate it.

Carefully Sam wrapped sterile pads and bandages around the cuts and when he finished, Castiel (unsteadily) rose to his feet and stumbled a little, reaching out to the wall for support.

"Are you all right?" Dean asked.

Castiel thought it over and nodded, allowing himself to briefly smile again. "I will be, thanks to the two of you."

* * *

Thank you so very much for taking the time to read this. Could it continue one day? Maybe. I don't really have any ideas but if you want to offer anything I'd gladly consider it. I hope you all have a very nice week.


End file.
